Heed them.

April 04, 2011

Tiger Blood

I've never commented on a story that would also be in a tabloid until now. There's a reason for that. I don't care about celebrities, and when I come to find out their business through other people's chit-chat, I'm not amused, because their behavior is, as a rule, cowardly and boring.

I love finding an exception to any rule. Charlie Sheen's recent activity hasn't been cowardly or boring. He might, for all I know, be a coward without his bodyguards, but he appears courageous to me. When his possible alcoholism, drug use, and polyamory came to be known, he didn't march to rehab or religious conversion or to give an apology, he gave several bizarre interviews, quotes from which could be taken as evidence of a mental health problem. I'm not bored, are you?

The tabloid reporters method is to delve into the lives of celebrities until they die in a car accident(remember?), or until some bit of muck is raked up, however insignificant(like something you, YOU, the guy reading, do regularly). After the muck is exposed, a celebrity agrees to every condition suggested to restore their image and reputation. That condition is almost always rehab.

'Fuckin rehab!' I thought, and 'Fuck everyone!' Charlie Sheen thought. He proceeded to insult his boss(a proud American tradition), and get fired. While he had been working on whatever shitty show only people over age 40 would ever watch, Mr. Sheen had showed up to shoot on time, all the time, and was kind to everyone present. That was his job, and he did it as well as I do mine. He made a lot more money then I ever will, but that's what's in a name- everything.

 After you were fired from acting on a show that paid you millions per episode, what would you do? March to rehab? Apologize? Retire? Or, organize a tour in which you ramble mindlessly to idiots who were dumb and bored enough to buy tickets to it?

He chose to organize a tour in which he rambles mindlessly to idiots who are dumb and bored enough to buy tickets to it. Why?

Tiger blood.

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